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[15 Nov 2009|10:39pm] |
Relationship Status:
life has been lonely lately, I can't seem to find someone that I'm actually interested in. Everyone in this area sucks lol. I get annoyed to easily and I have no patience. I set the bar to high for girls, but thats just me, I'm not looking to waste my time on something I can't imagine lasting. I need a girl that isn't clingy and can let me breathe, I enjoy my space. Also someone that can think for herself and not be a tool.
Family:
Well my family is alright, my brother doesn't call me anymore, our relationship went to shit. On the bright side he's living a good life, good for him. My father recently found out that his cancer went into remission, so that was the best news I've gotten in months. Hopefully it stays in remission, he starts his new job on monday. He's excited and I'm happy for him, he gets a chance to take his life back.
School:
School is great, I love SSC. I know people for a change unlike NSCC, which was horrible. I'm doing well and I like my major, it lets me be professional but still be creative at the same time. The semester is coming to a close and it has been fun and I can't wait for next semester.
Friends:
Awesome as always, I love all my close friends to death. Thank you guys for everything over the years
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[21 Oct 2009|08:16pm] |
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WOW. awesome
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[20 May 2009|11:58pm] |
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So my father went to the doctors the other day. Turns out that his cancer is really aggressive. The doctor told him there was a 50/50 chance that he'll die within the next 5 years. It sucks knowing that my dad will probably never see me get married or even have children. It's always in the back of my mind. When I think about it just makes me want to try harder to reach success, so I can make you proud. I'm going to end this with a quote from my dad "I'm gonna fight this to the end, I'm not going out like this."
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[10 May 2009|02:59pm] |
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I give up
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[22 Mar 2009|12:59am] |
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but...can't go to sleep.
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[22 Mar 2009|12:58am] |
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I'am tired.
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[01 Mar 2009|11:16am] |
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So random.
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[04 Feb 2009|09:15pm] |
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someone find me a chick that is nice.
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[13 Oct 2008|11:50pm] |
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things are a little lonely
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[29 May 2008|04:07pm] |
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Damn it feels good to be out of school. i feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Pretty much this past week I have been living life without a care in the world. I have been just doing whatever comes my way, not a planning a thing. I have just realized your young once and these are the years to live up your life(this isn't meant for drinking and doing drugs lol) I just want to have a real relaxed summer consisting of hanging with friends and having good times. I want to make this summer great and make up for my shitty one last year. So lets have fun and enjoy ourselves.
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[05 May 2008|10:58pm] |
“Reviling Tendency”
Paying the price of tonight’s crisis
couldn’t free your mind and dissect this
sections of tension ruining your faithless sensation
uncertain to see what we see
falling face first into the open sea of the torture you felt
riveting the blind is almost as is dealing with your kind
12-inch rails through your spine
acting only to define your fame
dismembering my family’s name
to sanely say your fine blatantly your alright
the strong still stay strong
and the unfortunate play as long as they can
only for today because when its your time to present your anger
we sense danger withdrawing from your state of mind
but I said “father stand in line your not the only one” - written by me
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[16 Mar 2008|04:35pm] |
“Deception and Corruption leads to overkill
Fill the moldings with metal
Blades of steal
Maneuver a way to conceal the bravery once stood
Hidden face covered by a velvet hood
Blacker nights will only make it colder
One touch will make you stay
One concern will make you convey
Lay beside the failed attempt
It will never leave your memory” - By me.
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[28 Feb 2008|10:55pm] |
"This is my demise conflicting with the creature that dies
Tear the limbs off the unseen monster
Crouch down centering the inner soul
Coiled and folded to engulf the flames of irony
Just as the word denial came to find me
Affiliated with a killer
To find destiny in a sinner
Only to show force without morals
But to adore the unseen is to adore the unimaginable." - written by me.
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[04 Feb 2008|08:28pm] |
I miss you being around and us doing boyfriend and girlfriend type stuff. I really really do love you so much. All I have been doing is thinking about you. When is this going to end?
I hurt.
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[30 Jan 2008|09:57pm] |
What have I done wrong?
Were do I go from here?
I ask myself these things. Why did you do this to me? I dont understand. Im stuck here to mourn while you have the comfort of being in someones arms. Life isnt a fair game nothing great really has come out in my life in the past two years, I cant get into college, the love of my life is gone. Our supposed to be two years found out she was dating someone. And then I look like an idiot saying I love you. Who am I kidding if she loved me she would be here with me and no one else. I guess this is what I get for letting people take advantage of me. I am just going to keep my feelings to myself. It has really made me think...that some people are lucky to have someone with them. I hate being by myself because all the memories replay in my mind. I lost love something that was just so cherishable to me. I reminis us laying in the grass in the cemetary and me holding you as we gazed in the sky, and the day I said the magic word "I Love You" and the expression that was on your face was like you wanted to jump out of your skin and stay with me forever. I really thought that these last 4 months of my high school career that maybe we could be together and just live out the experience before I graduated. It looks like that isnt going to happen. You say it was because I didnt ask you out but I was waiting for the 28th so it could be special. I hate that I care and I hate how I love you. I know I didnt really pay as much attention to you in the past couple weeks is because my head was somewhere else. I learned from this that dont wait around for something you want if its there and willing then take it.
I love you.
</3
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[07 Dec 2007|02:54pm] |
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whatever you chose your fate.
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[24 Nov 2007|11:24am] |
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I think about you to much for my own good.
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[18 Nov 2007|05:42pm] |
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be normal again. problem solved.
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[12 Nov 2007|12:00pm] |
Your doing it again....You lied you said you were going to stop fucking me over and im busy for 1 day and look it you.
fuck.
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[06 Oct 2007|07:16am] |
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my heart keeps racing a mile a minute...i throw up on a constant bases...i hate feeling like this...she killing me and she doesnt even know it.
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